Please comment on the damned poem. But please come with an open mind and some ounce of true intellect as well.?

meaning don't give on because it's long or confusing you. have struggle girls bra strap stuff ;) please don't leave trite comments "it's good" or "it sucks" tell me why sucks or why it's , like/dislike it, improve, needs work, succeeds etc etc. thank you time , consideration. love fellow poets out there.

(title)
ode cable news network written while watching $1500 tax credited sunset wink new window freshly installed bob, jim, , dale @ vinyl replacement windows & patio doors vista

(poem)
oh! passion lurks within misty wood, milky white, blushing lilies giggle sweetly in golden cups bees dream should, ecstasy in highest hallowed form! cherry red blossoms burst fitfully amongst humble underbrush ballerinas begging perform, full of youth (times stubborn yet doomed foe) , innocence (son of sin) mad frenzied schoolchildren drunk glory of dreamy afternoons napping beside towering oak-trees blending in deep maroons golden gods provide awe , inspiration thundering typhoons! on craggy cadaver green dews drip sighing sun , adding scattered perfume oriental palaces outdone inviting cushions of velvet fantasy, in damp chestnut coolness lark steals glance bowing branch poised ghostly silence, crow envious of cracks air stiff brooding nightly presence, while rejected moon high in heaven impatient wind attempts lonely grin spilling silvered lust upon damp heavy earth. ah! land of skyscrapers built , love, singing dove honey dove! why go thoughtless price tagged globe constructed , shoved sinful hands greedy demands, our fading empires becoming wastelands dank rollback muck of prices, clanking metal, rusted steel locomotives roaring, hear old fuzzy recording of broken industrial tongues while , squirm , writhe searching kind of romance amongst eggplant inspirations longing heart amongst dirty cigaretted dorito neighborhood streets grey , coarse yellow , dim lay markets past sad blue automobiles next freshly mown stinking grass, , neatly trimmed gardens performing neighborhood contests, antennas maggots on corpses line houses on our block, our windows tightly closed, curtains frightfully shut black sunset, skeletons wobble single daisy saw dead fly in ear, child weeping bluest of eyes oozing soggy petroleum tear while mother comforts him “it’s dream have nothing fear”

meaning don't give on because it's long or confusing you. have struggle girls bra strap stuff ;) please don't leave trite comments "it's good" or "it sucks" tell me why sucks or why it's , you...

Arts & Humanities Poetry Next